Days Before & After Delivery!

The days leading up to delivery seemed to go by sooo slow as they were happening. I was in between emotions due to being excited for E & A but terribly missing home. I kept telling myself I was going to get through this although most of the time I wanted to break down. I had never been away from my husband that long and having Ava without his help was wearing on me. I went for a lot of walks with Ava but toward the end of our stay we mostly kept in the apartment. I was sad that Ben wasn't with me but I looked forward to him being there during delivery. I tried to focus on 17 and keeping my nerves calm; the closer deliver day came the better I was.

I enjoyed the time I had with my kids and that is really what got me by those 3 weeks. It is not that Chicago isn't amazing because it is. There was so much to do and see; we loved our beach walks. We experience many new restaurants, sprout television shows (we only have Netflix back home so Ava had an educational experience with the T.V.), and friendly faces. I can see why families live in the city enjoying all its luxuries but it is still so unfamiliar to me and I'd rather stay in my small historic town.

This brings me to E & A's big news. They decided a while back to make a huge life decision. They moved to Michigan 2-3 weeks after delivery. Everything was planned out and it was very bitter sweet for E especially. She was in love with her job and the family-like bond she had in the office was priceless. Then again, they are both originally from Michigan (only one of the many coincidences). Both of their families lived in Michigan and not only did A work in Chicago, he also worked in Michigan part-time already. My last couple weeks in Chicago they were super busy getting moving plans together as they were not only waiting for GQ to arrive but were turning their lives completely upside down with a brand new surrounding as well. I'm sure they had many feelings at once but when it comes down to it they want the best for GQ.

The night before I went in to be induced I remember telling myself I wasn't going to get any sleep. I was so excited for Ben and my parents to get to Chicago so I ended up with 3 hours of rest before 3am came around. Ben is my hero. He went through this with full support from day 1. He has sacrificed his family being away and sooo much more than any of us have probably thought. The best thing for us to hear at the hospital was E & A's families not only thanking me but thanking Ben for being an incredible man because he was just as much a part of taking care of 17 as I was. He was calm and the most amazing delivery coach for A, E, and I. We all focused on Ben's encouraging words throughout and couldn't have done this without him. I'm very lucky to have him as my life partner.

After I was discharged Ben and I had to find a cab to get to the train station. This on a normal day would never be an issue but the entire town was celebrating the big hockey win and it was sooooo packed. You could not hardly walk down the main streets and every cab was stuffed with people. Errrrr this was very annoying! We ended up walking 5 or so blocks after I just delivered a baby. I was pure exhausted, walking as slow as a snail, and trying not to cry from the pain in my muscles and back. Poor Ben never complained as he had all the bags while one of them was starting to cut into his skin in his hand. ouch! A cab at last and for once I wasn't terrified for my life riding along. Scariest thing I've ever EVER experienced is a Chicago cab ride, hahaha! We made it just in time as our train was boarding when we arrived. Again, I was extremely exhausted, could barely walk at this point, and on the verge of ripping someone's...anyone's... head off if they asked me when I was due. lol! Yes, I did have one woman in the station ask if I was having a boy. ha! Yes, I did JUST have a boy. She then made the remark that she thought I was only 4 or 5 months along which may have saved her because I thought that wasn't too bad after just giving birth lol!

Finally we were on the train and settled in for our ride home...HOME! At this point we were both starving, I was still in pain, and I didn't care what else happened because I knew I was going to be home soon. This was a strange feeling though because I wasn't sure where home was. We moved right before I went to Chicago not giving me any time to get a sense of my new home, then slowly made Chicago our temporary home, and now I had to go back to this place that still didn't have that come home to feeling. We were picked up at the station by my mother in law and as soon as my foot hit the ground and I seen her face I started to cry. I slowly got to the van and we went home. I pulled myself together but seeing her face really hit me hard. I missed her and I was full of hormonal changes. It took me a couple weeks but I settled in and things started to feel normal again. I should say everything except my hormones and sore body. I couldn't do much the first week back as I still wasn't able to lift, drive, or stand too long. This killed me because I wanted to do it all, I even wanted to go back to work, crazy I know!

I had my 6 week checkup this past Thursday and have lost 15 pounds. I did end up making my weight gain goal of 30 pounds so I still have some to lose but all in all I am very happy with myself and how I look. While being home I have been very productive with the house remodel creating my own little projects to spruce things up. We are doing things ourselves so it is taking slightly longer but we have 2 new windows in, our dining and living rooms have been completely torn apart, a wall knocked down, insulation in, drywall mostly up, and shutters down/painted/back up. All with my husband working 50 plus hours a week, very proud of us. I have been enjoying my time off work but some days are harder than others. I do not have the personality to be a stay at home mom and it starts to drive me crazy being at home all day everyday. I keep very very busy especially with David and Ava but I am ready to go back to work and look forward to that time.

Now we are getting back into the swing of our previous routines and both finding what makes us happy. Ben is no longer going to be working his current position and has been offered a better option locally making around the same amount of money being able to spend more time at home. We are taking all of the positives in our life and leaning on those knowing that more great things are coming our way. I am in the process of finding a new job that relates to my educational background that will give me more of a mom schedule with my nights and weekends at home with my family.


After this journey flew by as perfect as could be we had a lot to think about. Did we want to separate from E & A? We have still been communicating regularly, sharing stories, photos, text messages, and yet it still doesn't feel like anything is ending. This makes me happy because we weren't sure in the beginning how any of us would feel about keeping in contact. Apparently we all are pretty comfortable. E would text me the first couple weeks quite often about GQ and how she missed me, this made me feel good. She always knows how to bring a tear to my eye. Just a small part of an e-mail I received from E & A a couple weeks ago about Baby G ---> "I think of you everyday when I stare at this little miracle. You gave G life -- you gave us life! I can't believe we are going through the same things: new house, new routine, job searching, seeing our hubbies more now. We will get together soon planning a weekend visit with GQ."   

I'm Feeling Thankful!

We now talk once a week most of the time through texts, e-mails, and photos. She loves being G's mommy and A loves being his daddy. Toward the end of the pregnancy E joked with me about one of her nurses telling her that she would be her surrogate in a heartbeat. E responded with how wonderful I am and that if I were to ever (fingers crossed) want to do this again that she wanted to keep me as their surrogate for as long as I wanted. I had to LOL because at that point I wasn't thinking past this pregnancy one bit. Then I thought, do I want our journey to end so soon? Absolutely not! I told her without a doubt that I would do this again. I have no regrets and things have been more than perfect. I could never expect the same greatness the second time around though, is that even possible!? The further along I got in the pregnancy right up to after delivering  the conversation of carrying for them again got more serious.

Ben and I have decided to continue this journey with them, me being their second time gestational surrogate. Gosh I feel great saying that! Like I said, we are family now and I would do anything for them. We have discussed things with our fertility center and with 6 months of uterine rest we will schedule our 2nd transfer in November/December. "So another Chicago summer adventure .... hmmm.. we should write a book :)" said E.

A thank you goes out to all my family for always being there to support and reassure me when others got me down. A thank you to my friends and supporters for following our story of inspiration, shedding a little light on the good things that still happen in the world. A thank you to E & A and their entire family for trusting us and treating us like their own family. The biggest thank you to GQ, that little boy has changed the lives of all of us. He will grow to do to amazing things in his lifetime and if I gave him anything out of this experience I hope it is that he knows there are good people in the world. I hope he can be a positive person, educate others, and not let the negativity and ignorance of others get in his way.

Love,